Monday, December 25, 2006
Adoption Illusions
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On Christmas day I read a story that went like this:
Judge's gavel is 'amen' to family's adoption of Bible-toting toddler
By JOSHUA BOAK
BLADE STAFF WRITER
"The 2 1/2-year-old carries a small Bible, a worn book of rounded corners and tattered pages littered with his drawings.
"Some children cradle a blanket at night. Kassani sleeps with a King James translation. Though unable to read, he wants a new "bubble" for Christmas.
"Kassani likes Mickey Mouse, chicken wings, broccoli, and Thomas the Tank Engine. If he is thirsty enough, Kassani does more than drink apple juice: He wears it on his T-shirt.
"When Kassani arrived last June at the caramel-colored house in West Toledo, he instantly called Jolan and Heather Hardiman "Daddy" and "Mommy."
"Those were among the only words he knew. Every man was a "Daddy." Each woman, a "Mommy."
But Kassani was no one's child until last week. The Hard-
imans finalized the adoption in Lucas County Probate Court on Dec. 21, ending a yearlong process and embarking on a forever commitment to a piston-legged boy with still eyes."
Please join me in writing letters explaining that every child is someone's child! Even Jesus Christ - immaculately conceived - had an very human earthly parent.
Language like this both expresses and proliferates the illusion of adoption rescuing parentless children and adoptive parents becoming "the only parents" instead of
what they are - caretakers for another's child. It invalidates reality for the child and the adoptive parents who need to accept that they are taking into their heart and home a child with a heritage, not one dropped from the sky.
One can only hope that this child's placement is "forever." The National Adoption Information Clearinghouse estimated in 2004 that 10 to 25% of so-called “forever families” are, in fact, not permanent.
The author can be reached at: jboak@theblade.com
LETTERS
letters@theblade.com
On Christmas day I read a story that went like this:
Judge's gavel is 'amen' to family's adoption of Bible-toting toddler
By JOSHUA BOAK
BLADE STAFF WRITER
"The 2 1/2-year-old carries a small Bible, a worn book of rounded corners and tattered pages littered with his drawings.
"Some children cradle a blanket at night. Kassani sleeps with a King James translation. Though unable to read, he wants a new "bubble" for Christmas.
"Kassani likes Mickey Mouse, chicken wings, broccoli, and Thomas the Tank Engine. If he is thirsty enough, Kassani does more than drink apple juice: He wears it on his T-shirt.
"When Kassani arrived last June at the caramel-colored house in West Toledo, he instantly called Jolan and Heather Hardiman "Daddy" and "Mommy."
"Those were among the only words he knew. Every man was a "Daddy." Each woman, a "Mommy."
But Kassani was no one's child until last week. The Hard-
imans finalized the adoption in Lucas County Probate Court on Dec. 21, ending a yearlong process and embarking on a forever commitment to a piston-legged boy with still eyes."
Please join me in writing letters explaining that every child is someone's child! Even Jesus Christ - immaculately conceived - had an very human earthly parent.
Language like this both expresses and proliferates the illusion of adoption rescuing parentless children and adoptive parents becoming "the only parents" instead of
what they are - caretakers for another's child. It invalidates reality for the child and the adoptive parents who need to accept that they are taking into their heart and home a child with a heritage, not one dropped from the sky.
One can only hope that this child's placement is "forever." The National Adoption Information Clearinghouse estimated in 2004 that 10 to 25% of so-called “forever families” are, in fact, not permanent.
The author can be reached at: jboak@theblade.com
LETTERS
letters@theblade.com
# posted by Senior Mom @ 4:59 PM 
